Man of Steel (2013)

"Man of Steel" is a spectacle in search of a soul, and it's not for want of trying. This Superman origin story is highlighted by action set-pieces that palpably depict superhuman fighting but Zack Snyder's heavy-handed attempts to milk his material for emotional resonance (be it in the scenes between Clark Kent's Kryptonian parents or in his earth-bound dad's self-sacrifice) fall flat, creating a pretty weird, unreal kind of vibe that fortunately isn't quite oppressive enough to overshadow the movie's entertainment factor. It helps that this cast is pretty nice too, with Amy Adams a welcome presence as Lois Lane, Michael Shannon doing good work as antagonist General Zod, Kevin Costner making the most of his few scenes as Clark Kent's one-note human father, and Henry Cavill putting in a good shift as Superman. I kinda feel like "Man of Steel" should have had a bigger climax than it does, but since it is essentially the first part of a trilogy (or so I'm told) I guess I can forgive a somewhat sedate conclusion. Worth a watch for action movie fans, but nothing truly spectacular, except maybe for that incredible scene that's basically a bunch of giant dicks blasting into space.

Roswell UFO Conspiracy: Unlocked (2020)

You know how it is. You wanna watch something but your attention spans in the toilet right now. A whole ass movie? Nah. You head on over to Amazon Prime and start scrolling. Before you know it your in that section populated entirely by documentaries about aliens and bigfoot that you've never heard of, for good reason. There's one about Roswell, and it's only 52 minutes! True turn-your-brain-off goofiness. But they're always shit, folks! "Roswell UFO Conspiracy: Unlocked" is a particularly egregious mauling of the 'documentary' form. It features none of the silly re-enactments of alien abductions, body retrievals or interviews that are typically the highlights of these things. Instead, you get snippets of the debunked alien autopsy film of the 1990s, with the bulk of the actual movie consisting of a boring old man waffling on endlessly about the film's changing position in the Roswell mythos and how he wasted fourteen years on it. Why he's taking revenge for his own mistakes on the late-night browsers of Amazon Prime's catalogue is never adequately explained, but you definitely feel punished by the end of it.

Sinister (2012)

Forgetting the rules of horror movies as he sets out to unravel the facts of a series of seemingly linked family murders, true crime author Ellison Oswalt (Ethan Hawke) moves his family into the house where one of the massacres occurred (he got it for a bargain price, natch) and sets about solving (or is that unleashing?) the mystery. More of a slow-burn horror that's all about steadily ratcheting up the sense of dread as its characters are engulfed by an uncertain evil, "Sinister" falls flat when it detours into the realm of jumpscares and truncated scenes of violence, but is for the most part pretty damn engrossing. It helps that Ethan Hawke is committed to the bit, gamely sipping whiskey as he searches through the mysterious "home movies" that depict the murders and perhaps hold the key to their cause, and even getting in a good scream or two before the movie's muted but eerie ending. This isn't a great film -- or even a particularly original one -- but it does most of what it needs to do (a bit more bloodshed would have been nice!) and does it quite well. Bughuul is a pretty cool antagonist, too.

Barbarian (2022)

When a horror movie trades in ramshackle stupidity, it helps for it to have a good sense of humour. Otherwise, you get eyerolls where you could have had cackles, and the film becomes a bit of a chore. Enter "Barbarian", in which director Zach Cregger assembles a pretty excellent cast (Georgina Campbell, Bill Skarsgard, Justin Long, Richard Brake) and has them more-or-less fumble about uselessly as their lives are imperiled by a deranged and monstrous woman living in the basement of an Airbnb home. You'd think the movie has to be a crazy good time a la "Terrifier 2" or intensely claustrophobic a la "The Descent" but it actually winds up being neither, residing at a halfway point between the two that's not a very satisfying place to be. It's just messy, incoherent and the bad kind of dumb. Not that it's all bad: the makeup and practical effects work here is excellent, even if it's just tarting up a bad movie whose only non-visual point of interest is in the uncertain principles of Justin Long's character (to say nothing of his butterfingers). Everyone else seems to love "Barbarian", though, so what do I know?